On July 28, 2011, after almost 3 1/2 tears of femme training, Mistress Cassie announced to the world, in a post Her blog, that i am now Her trained sissy.
i was very excited at the time, but i'm just now understanding the full implications of that announcement. Since then, i have been scheduled as to which color my panties are every day. Today is pink day, Her favorite. Pink is the gold standard for sissies, and of course i wore pink today. i love pink! It is a close second to my favorite - yellow. Cuckold panties day. i am allowed to change panty color for pictures. i was in yellow for a half an hour to show two things. One, i'm still caged, approaching 48 hours now.
And two, that being Her trained sissy means that i am now "Property of Mistress Cassie." Like any piece of property i am used how and whenever the Owner chooses. One day it may be a little cage training, some cuckolding, or some off the cuff sissy assignment that amuses Her. i am now here to please Her, it's all about Mistress Cassie.
Why insert the yellow panty shots today? Because i caged at 12:01 a.m.Wednesday morning w/o masturbating and here i am now. Yellow equals cuckolding to me. Back when She gave me a weekend dose of it, i was caged and had to suck on my dildo for 200 minutes over the weekend. Welcome to the cuckold world.
Since Her July 28, 2011 post, i have noticed one big change. She put Her finger on it during last Friday's phone session. She carves Her initials on sissies brains while She trains them. A part of that is Her hypnosis training, but most of it is just Her - period. Mistress Cassie in irresistible, undeniable Force to a sissy.
Now i am wide open, beyond vulnerable. Now She casually adds phrases that have a lasting impact. She has carved Her whole name on my brain. After the 48 hours of cuckold training back in August She gave me release during the phone session afterwards. When i remarked that my jaw was sore, She said "Be grateful that it was just a dildo, not a penis gag".
Subsequently, i bought a pump up penis gag with a strap to keep it in place. i haven't posted about it until tonight, because She doesn't need any more ammunition. The war is over, Mistress Cassie has won. She always wins.The sad fact (for me anyway) is that since the gag arrived, every time i've masturbated, it's been in place. The closer i get to cumming the more i pump it.
All it took was that one remark for Her. Why? Because She has carved Her whole Name on my brain.Yes, Mistress allows me to play my picture game, but the real game is Hers. It's a reality game that i cannot win. That's the nature of being a piece of Her property.
my silly picture game lately has featured Tatiana in Her yellow panties - with Her lover. When i lost that game to Tatiana early Wednesday morning, the cage went on and so did yellow.
i lost and the winner was not Tatiana, it was Mistress Cassie. That's the difference now. i get it. i don't like to lose. But i've lost at Mistress Cassie's game, and the stakes were high. There's no double or nothing, no redo, no second chance. She has won and it's a permanent victory for Her.
Now, i am at Her mercy. i am about to enter day three of caging without masturbation. Instead of the old sissy frenzy that used to accompany lengthy periods of 'self caging', i'm seeing very clearly tonight. It's all about acceptance of what's happened.The picture game didn't cage me, and Tatiana didn't cage me. Mistress Cassie caged me, w/o saying a word, early Wednesday morning.
She's too good at what She does to resort to that direct approach. It's too easy for Her, and her time is too valuable. She carved the caged into my brain while She was carving Her initials for over 3 years. Now that She's carved 'Property of Mistress Cassie" in my brain, the cage goes on involuntarily. i need that cage now, just like i need my Mistress.
It makes me feel better about being owned when someone like Tatiana, in Her pretty yellow panties, gets me caged. Yes, i've lost again at my picture game. But the carving on my brain made me lose, to fill the need. i can't imagine wearing this thing all of the time, but when i try to ignore it, it's futile. i'd be better off wearing it regularly in small doses.
So, during Friday's phone session with Mistress, She gave me another taste of cuckolding me. That's the mood She was in that day.
Oh, my - i'm getting ready to start another day caged, and there's a Man's hand IN Tatiana's pretty panties! Oh no!
The carving continues................
sissy maid diane